#it’s almost as if when you’re old
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What pjo or hoo character do we think would let out The Sigh. Like, that sigh that the ‘mature people’ do that says “I’m so fucking done with this I need to sit on my couch in front of a tv sipping on some debatably gross drink to undo the headache this is giving me”, occasionally giving some “I can already feel the grey hairs coming in” too.
#pjo#percy jackson and the olympians#heroes of olympus#hoo#pjo characters#hoo characters#the sigh#I call it that#pjo questions#hoo questions#character hcs#pjo character hcs#hoo character hc#pjo character hc#speaking about grey hairs#why is everyone so afraid to age#like mf would u rather be immortal#if you’re 50 ofc you’re going to look 50 calm down#ppl do those ‘dermatologist approved’ aging filters and they’re shocked to see… that they look aged#wow so shocking I know😨#it’s almost as if when you’re old#you look old
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the death of kujou masamune
#death mark#spirit hunter death mark#yashiki kazuo#masamune kujou#死印#found out today that it’s death mark’s 7th anniversary like#i got into this series at shou years old and now i am almost mashita years old#time flies when you’re making old men go through it#art by yuyu
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You know somehow I completely forgot, but I originally had Four’s powers in the IAU be him splitting, and then each piece of him having a different power (like fire for Red, etc). I haven’t really been writing him that way, but... maybe that makes more sense??
#was looking through a few notes I have on powers and stuff and I just stopped and went ‘huh. forgot about that’#which is what happens when you’re disorganized!#and have an au that’s almost two years old#ha.#anyway thoughts..?#rambles from the floor#incredibles au
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do not EVER think its annoying to liveblog stuff this is like parasocial equivalent of getting a friend into something and waiting for The Thing to happen (and in my experience pokesp fans are just rabidly desperate to get new ppl into it in general lol) im sure its not at the top of ur radar by any means but if u ever get round to the hoenn manga arcs one day PLEASE liveblog that. its not as philosophical or anything but it gets so much crazier. u have no idea how much crazier. i love pokesp. sinnoh arcs are also extremely good
#YAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYY#that’s what i like to hear :]#half of the joy of experiencing a thing is having old fans alongside me on the journey#to give me trivia and advice (if it’s a game i’m playing)#to watch me descend into madness in real time#i for one certainly know it’s really fun watching other people get into things i’m obsessed with#i can’t shut my mouth#plus it lets me relive my own experience right#so i delight in being able to provide that joy for others#pokémon#asks#thanks anon#i’ll read the hoenn arcs if i. Play the hoenn games someday ❤️#bc i want to. i really do. although my next top priority for mainline pokémon games is actually alola#you’re right i should read the sinnoh arcs actually. i had some people telling me about them while i was liveblogging platinum#i have been told the kanto and johto arcs are actually really good and like a solid story almost separate from the games#i don’t have a particular interest in playing those games tbh but i will consider the manga. possibly. someday#gotta read the new paldea one too… (and. watch horizons lol)#but i know the real day we all explode is when i finally play a pmd game#bc pmd fans are Insane Human Beings. if i mention it for one second they JUMP me and try to bully me into playing it#i’m almost scared. like it seems to have permanently rewritten something in them. but i will indulge someday
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Concerning the Death Eater Cult Under Voldemort; The First Wizarding War
What the uneducated See: Nazi Comparisons
What I see: Manson Family Vibes
Just an observation….
#Severus snape has more in common with Manson Cult survivor Diana Lake than he does any SS officer but hall not ready for that conversation#btw I am NOT saying that they are exactly the same#it’s just that the nazi comparison is getting super old and it was inaccurate to start with#all I’m saying is that if you’re going to make real life comparisons it should be accurate#seriously#also this is not a shitpost#those poor families#the Longbottoms have some in common with Sharon Tates case namely the babe#Neville almost died#also#this is NOT minimizing anything the Manson family did they were real life murderers and the death eaters are of course fictional#Severus was groomed by a cult at a young age#read any books on the Manson family and you will see clear similarities in how Charles Manson and Voldemort groomed followers to join him#severus was only 15 when he was being recruited and Diana Lake the youngest Manson family member was only 14 when she joined “The Family#severus snape#this isn’t defense or not?#just an observation I made from someone who has studied cases of cults a lot#snape
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#soph’s posts#I joined this website when I was a middle schooler#I was so scared of everything and I had no idea who I was#And now it’s rosh hashanah and I’m almost a full adult#I have so many cool friends and the lead in a play and I think I know where I want to go to college#I honest to god am the happiest I’ve ever been in my day-to-day life right now#If you’d told september 2020 me who I’d be by the time I was this old I know she wouldn’t have believed you#Sitting on my bathroom floor on the verge of tears about the passage of time. You know how it is#But yeah. I love this hellsite and I love my friends. If you’re my tumblr friend please know I wouldn’t be the person I am without you#And I know by the time another year rolls by I’ll be a different person than I am right now as well#But I’m very happy this moment is what it is for me.#Sappy af but it’s true
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I loved the new mad max furiosa but still feel like they missed some important info 😩
#these technically could be almost spoilers but I doubt it if you’ve seen the old movies / new#like you’re telling me immortan joe didn’t freak when she went missing ?#for all those years ??#AND#did she get a pass/reward for being a next level warrior rather being a breeder ?? I would’ve loved to know
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I miss my old coworkers!!! I miss having friends at work instead of passive aggressive assholes who don’t want to train me and then get annoyed when I don’t know things and act like my very existence irks them!!!!
#if this was part time I’d be able to handle it#but 9 hours a days day after day is genuinely putting me in the worst mindset I’ve had in months#like I go to my car during my break and sit there pushing tears back bc I feel alone and shunned!!!#and these are GROWN ASS WOMEN??#one of my old coworkers came in to pick up a medication the other day and when I saw her my entire body literally slumped with relief#like omg someone I know who doesn’t hate me!!!!#and we had a quick convo bc she was updating me on work tea and I was like wow I haven’t felt this happy since i started this job#almost 2 weeks ago and that was such a sad reality check lmfao#and like the only reason I got this job is bc I’m bilingual and they desperately needed that#and it’s like okay do you realize you need me?? bc I’m there most of the week the other bilingual girl is only there twice a week#and 99% of your clients don’t speak English so what’s gonna happen if I leave??#you’re going to have to find someone else and train THEM from the bottom just like me#you’re gonna be in the same position all over again!!!#this is all so infuriating
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(Arcane s1 ep3 spoilers) why have I seen. Nobody talk about this scene because it actually drives me insane
#‘for that I thank you…………………….. old friend’ YOU SINISTER ASS MENTALLY ILL OLD MAN DEAR GOD????#anyway. silco is sooo interesting to me it’s literally insane like#yes he’s manipulative but. he doesn’t view what he’s doing as morally wrong? does that make sense#he comes across in a way that makes me believe that he. thinks what he’s doing is right. and I think that makes his character so human#I’ve seen soo many villains who r like yeah what im doing is wrong what abt it lol#AND THATS GOOD AND INTERESTING IN ITS OWN WAY!!!!#but. when they genuinely believe in what they’re doing it makes it so much more interesting because it’s almost like#you’re seeing it from multiple perspectives almost?? and I love that#none of this made any sense I know but this wholeee monologue drives me insane it’s soo. so good#everyone watch arcane now please#for. for me :3#olls thoughts 💭#Youtube
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Hello,
I realize that I haven’t really been “here” for roughly an entire year now. My last “me” post was right before coming into 2024.
In light of the recent election as of 2024–I was starkly reminded of my descent into madness, anger, bitterness and concern from the year 2016. I was still living at home with my parents, single and no kids. I thought the world as I knew it was coming to an end and I thought everyone I knew who voted for Trump weee backstabbing, bold faced liars; most of these people were my friends and it was disheartening to believe that if they supported someone like him but were playing cool to my face, who could I trust and believe in after all?
I disappeared from then and I found solace in the Naruto fandom, the only place I was able to quell my anger and hurt from the world and reality I was apart of. I will never take for granted the people I met during this time, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it for eternity: they saved my life.
Fast forward to 2024 and I am still single and living alone but this time it’s been 3 years since moving out and life is less hectic and different…but it’s better.
Most people don’t know that I entered into a relationship in August 2023 that was rushed and misaligned with everything I wanted and valued but I became desperate for partnership, acceptance and value. So I settled with someone who went on to teach me great lessons, mainly that you shouldn’t rush connections for anyone or any reason. I finally departed from that relationship as of September 2024 and slowly my world has come back into full bloom again, I’m not seeing everything in gray scale or feeling like an outsider looking in. I’m apart of my own life. I became my own main character.
That said, I also have been stable with my career for over a year now and this has allowed me to have fun money and take vacations! I recently visited Washington DC on a whim and I just so happened to be there before and after the US Election of 2024. Despite the bustling of the world on tv news and social medias; the home of where the President resides is actually fairly quaint and quiet. Many people didn’t voice their concerns or opinions about the election, many of them seemed to understand that this is just how the world works and we will have to fall in line. All that being said, I learned plenty about myself while on this trip and about life in general.
Having emotional intelligence will always save your life. No matter what situations you face or endure, even overcome, staying sharp and remaining emotionally adept is key. Nobody stormed the White House nor the Capital. People just slung their briefcases from one shoulder to the next and stood in line for the next approaching metro.
Life really does go on.
I wanted to share some pictures I had taken while on my 4 day vacation. I like these the most because the rest are pictures of the museums I went to, lol. However these are the only pictures I’ve taken of myself since January 2024.
Being in that rotten relationship really took so much out of me, it took away my light and my enthusiasm for the world and everything around me. I wasn’t taking pictures of myself or anyone else; I was just existing from one day to the next.
To see these photos and my sheer happiness and I can actively say I AM happy with my life and the way it’s going currently—feels like a milestone I actually want to commemorate, so I’m sharing them.
As this year comes to an end, please stay safe and golden. The election was sorely disappointing for a country as a whole but nonetheless we will persevere. We always have. Thanks for reading!
#me#personal#long post#selfie#my face#I haven’t felt happy or beautiful for an entire year#I wish I could explain what codependency depression does to you#your entire life flashes you by but you feel like your only purpose is to serve someone else#you just fade into the background of your own life#then you look up and it’s been an entire year and you have pictures from the previous year that you took and it feels like yesterday#but not in a good way#because it feels like while time has come and gone you have remained the same#frozen in time and in place#but because you were so desperate to have what everyone else has you settle for the first thing that comes along#and then you feel guilty and ashamed when it doesn’t work out because nothing ever works out for you#or so you tell yourself#but then one day you decide I don’t care what other people think or what other people have anymore#I want to live#this is my life and I only get one chance and screw being everyone’s else’s something#screw wanting the traditional life that people shove down your throat#you’re only 28 years old and you don’t have kids and you have been able to support yourself for almost 4 years#yet you feel like you owe the world something when really you owe nothing to anyone but you#you forgive yourself for not being where you THOUGHT you wanted to be and live life for YOU#you sit on your balcony reading horror stories and go to bed wrapped in pokemon sheets and you don’t care about feeling like a grown woman#you just want to be YOU and happy#you realize the apartment you’ve had for 4 years has been a space you kept wanting to accommodate other people in#so you made it a place that THEY would feel comfortable in#your home wasn’t even your home but because you thought you owed everyone else something#you didn’t notice#until the day you realize that your life is passing you by and you’re too busy feeling guilty for not being where everyone else is
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me and the generic extra strong Tylenol and the pure rage in my system
#Every once in a while I think. It’s not too bad home. I’m over dramatic. It’s not bad and it won’t be bad when I go home and never been bad#Then actually think and remember#I shouldn’t have been hit as a small child. I thank god that my parents stopped that with me.#But also. I should have been taken seriously when I went To them with concerns and shouldn’t have been brushed off.#But also to be a 14 something year old and to realize your parents aren’t in love is a crushing feeling#Since that must have been when. 13-14. Appa passed. Pandemic times. I’m sure my father. Since this would have been the last time I saw Appa#We went down to visit. Dad didn’t go he had work. He sent us off. I remember sitting in the passenger seat by mom in driver#Dad praying for our safe travel and for him going in for a kiss and the moment of hesitation and unwant from my mother#And the awkward silence and the way everything seemed to just shift to the side#That was summer of 2019. My first time realizing my parents weren’t both in love happened when I was 13-14.#I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.#And going to college has me feeling so guilty. Like I fucking ditched my siblings? The kids I raised as a child myself?#(I had to go. I don’t know if my scholarship would have held I don’t know if my financial aid would have held. I couldn’t have waited. )#(I would have likely done something bad to myself. Genuinely. If I weren’t able to be here. If I had to stay. I wouldn’t survive that.)#my siblings are fine. They have no responsibilities. My sister is manipulative. They will manage. They want me to get the education I need#They aren’t going to have to use their own college money to pay to be able to eat because the parents won’t feed them for the summer#I went into college with at least a couple hundred less than I should have. Because I had to parent. I had to feed my siblings.#And I had to pay to fill the gas tank on my father’s gas eater truck. We couldn’t be home because of the selling home situation.#I had to do something to get us out and to feed us but I didn’t get paid back for anywhere near all of it#I don’t regret it. But a kid shouldn’t have to pay for them and their siblings to live.#But then I remember the dread I have for returning ‘home’ for the breaks. I don’t know what I’m going to do.#If I can’t work all of the breaks then I either won’t be able to pay next semester#Or I’ll have almost no money in savings. Like nothing to my name. Can’t buy gas. Can’t do anything. Can’t buy food.#Unless the next scholarship stuff I’m doing pulls through. But I’m willing to work the whole break just to get away from either house.#I want to violently shake my parents and get them to comprehend#Father you have dropped 260$ into my bank account in the last two weeks. Why could this not be earlier in the semester.#Why couldn’t that be in the time and fashion you FUCKING PROMISED for helping me pay my schooling?#You have money to spare. Stupid. Why couldn’t you help like you promised.#Mom you fucker. I get that you are kinda with a new man now. But you’re leading yourself into a relationship with a man you said yourself#You don’t want to date because he wants to move away with his sister and because he hates it here
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Started replaying BBS and. Wow there’s a lot I don’t remember
#ven dandelion seed symbolism when he enters the. the heartscape/station of awakening dimension#can we talk abt how weird it is that sora’s brand-new heart decides to link up with ven#and why is it so articulate. why does it know how to wake up#’but first we need to open the door’ the way ven and sora’s voices overlap when this line is spoken#what is the door. will we ever know what the god damn door is .#how does a brand-new heart know all this ! how does it know about the door !!#also old man xehanort telling ven’s like almost-corpse about how small and empty the world of destiny islands is#how it’s like a prison and ven will fit right in#first of all. what the fuck does that mean .#second . ven doesn’t stay on the destiny islands so wtf is this old man talking about#third . why did he even bring ven there in the first place like what was the purpose#and fourth well. it’s just funny of old man nort to talk abt how empty the islands are when the main island is full of people lmao#no duh it seems empty you’re on the play island 🙄 idiot#also! the opening w the three wayfinder charms turning into the cinderella#snow white and aurora heart stations that sora sees during his awakening in kh1#like oh it’s not just aesthetic that’s why those are there
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nine after destroying the universe
#sonic prime#sonic prime spoilers#listen this is probably exactly what happens when you give a troubled 8 year old the power of a god so#he’s a little shit until the jig is up and then runs behind his older brother when it all goes to shit before you can hit him back#he never really apologized though which was fine before bc he owed everyone nothing but THEN tried to beat the shit out of them#and then FREAKED OUT WHEN EVERYONE ROLLED UP AFTERWARDS LMAO#not a diss against nine at all this is the most eight year old behavior#but I will say the ending was a little rushed#I know nine was conflicted and was almost talked down before the huge fight but idk it felt weird for him to be as hurt by sonic as he was#to the point at which he nearly obliterated everything and everyone in his way#only to kinda give up at the end after Sonic apologized to him like sir you were literally airing him out the WHOLE time#on the grocery store PA system and NOW you’re good???#idk how I feel about it because again it is a very kid thing to do to just act out without thinking but it’s also nine who is v calculated#anyways#sonic
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It frustrates me to no end that everyone I talk to someone new my brain catastrophises to the point where even though I know logically it’s fine, and normal, and fun, I end up making it a bigger deal in my head that I know it is…I think myself into spirals that the logical part of my brain knows are ridiculous and dramatic and improbable, which stress me out more than is entirely necessary…it’s so tiring to exist and participate in the social world sometimes
#personal#night time ramblings#the potentially autistic side of my brain really comes to party when I begin a new social relationship in any capacity#my analytical brain is not compatible with the lawless wasteland of socialising with someone new#gonna just ramble a bit about this situation here where I don’t have to make a lotta sense#I’ve been talking to a guy I’ve known for many year but never been properly friends with#we were in the same friendship circle when we were teenagers#but in different groups#we’ve literally been talking again for maybe 5 days#it’s taken me a few days to be more or less certain that our conversations are more than 2 sort of old friends catching up#like I think we’ve been flirting a little we’re going to go for a drink maybe he jokingly called me babygirl earlier#it’s been nice to be in that talking stage with a guy but without the awkward first few conversations where you’re getting to know the basic#I’ve always thought he was a nice guy our political and moral leaning have always been pretty similar he’s alright looking#that’s the extent of it#but of course my brains going haywire#scripting conversations I need to have if this become serious#wondering how hell react to less fun things about me physically or personality wise#wondering if and when we’ll ever have sex and if hell be any good 😂#trying to work out if hell get on with my family#like the whole 9 fucking yards#and it’s so fucking silly#like it isn’t that deep in the fucking slightest#it has the potential to be#and if it’s not it won’t be that upsetting to me#I’ll be a bit bummed out for a day or 2 and that’s it#I know myself well enough#but in the moment my brain always speed runs times everything could go wrong reasons it could fail reasons things will never succeed for me#and it doesn’t help that almost every romantic partner or potential I’ve ever had has proved this dumb shit right#but at what point does it become a self-fulfilling prophecy?#I sometimes think deep deep down I’m just a hopeless romantic hidden under layers of cynicism and emotional repression😂
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#the way my sister complains about having no games for her ds and switch when she let both of her exes keeps all of the games#like girl you could have took some of them and you didn’t!!! why is this suddenly my problem#my mom is telling me to be nice and share when switch games don’t work like that#and I don’t trust her to not mess stuff up in the game for me#like she threw away half of my nail polish today because I kept it in her room before she moved back in bc my room is very small and she#thought that gave her liberty to throw the ones she thought looked old away???#and then she got mad when I made her dig them out of the trash like!!!! you could have just brought them over to my room like a normal#person but you decided to start throwing shit out instead#anyway I’m sorry for complaining it’s just annoying having everyone tell me to be nice when I couldn’t be nicer#just because you’re going through a hard time doesn’t mean you can snap at mom when she asks a simple question#‘but it reminds me of my girlfriend and how she always fights with me 🥺’ but you knew mom for longer and you know she hates when people get#upset with her!!! and it sucks bc she doesn’t understand how hard it is to be the only person my parents can complain to because they#don’t have friends#she doesn’t understand why I’m the one always confronting her about stuff when my parents are scared of her getting mad at them bc every#time you say something simple like ‘hey don’t leave your shoes in the middle of the floor’ she gets upset and I’m the only one who doesn’t#let it actually get to me… at least it doesn’t bother me after I post a tumblr rant okay bye#it’s just the same childhood drama except she’s almost 30 and I’m almost 21 like be serious
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oh my god shut the fuck up
#☕️!- clove speaks#like martha speaks#twst#I’ll main tag idgaf 😭😭#something mentally wrong??? Mf those are FICTIONAL CHARACTERS#me when the villain characters are villains#no I’m sorry people like this are so fucking annoying all the characters have done bad shit#if you’re going to judge based on their actions or who they’re based off of then let us remind you that idia tried to end the WORLD#Vil almost committed murder#Malleus is currently holding a whole island hostage#and Jamil is based on a man who wanted a 16 year old#and Leona is based on scar who was based on HITLER.#Are all Idia Vil Malleus Jamil and Leona fans mentally ill because they like a character??? god stfu you people are so fucking stupid#do u actually have a problem w these characters or do you just not like them bc you don’t find two of them attractive lets be honest
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